I feel incredibly vulnerable sharing this part of my heart but I know I am not the only Christian who has wrestled with loving God in the midst of despair. Here’s part of my story. As I stood on a bridge in Philadelphia, I looked down at the water and wept loudly. People were all around me as they were walking to work. It was a normal day for them. I called my pastor friend and somehow got the words out of my mouth. They came out without hesitation. “I hate Him. I HATE GOD!” I sobbed. I was realizing that my son was dying. I saw it in the doctor’s eyes as I ran…
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Signs of Grief
As we walked out of our temporary apartment just one mile from the children’s hospital, all I could do was marvel the happenings of normal life around me. We had rented this particular place to be as close to our son as possible. My husband and I were making our way once again to the cardiac intensive care unit but this walk was different from all the previous walks on this same route. We had lost our precious boy the day before to heart disease. I turned toward my husband and said, “They have no idea what we’ve just been through,” referring to the family on the sidewalk near us. Our routine walk to the hospital continued and it included going through…
